How Compulsive Behaviors Develop

Fixed on Food
Rebellion is an ugly part of the human character. Tell a rebellious kid not to do something and sure enough, he will do it. We don’t like to be told what to do (or what not to do). When we tell ourselves, “I will not eat that cake,” another defiant voice answers, “You’re not telling me what to do.” Then the battle starts between the ears. Trenches are dug. The side of selfish indulgence stubbornly hangs on to the desire to eat cake. It hears some great propaganda messages like “I deserve it. One slice won’t hurt.” We start to feel deprived. Precious pleasure is being taken away and we feel hurt. Emptiness and pain well up, resolve weakens.
We want to run from the pain into the comfort of food. Anticipation is revved to full power with a single focus . . . cake. Emotions redline on adrenaline ready for the impulse to bite. The side of self-control is desperate: “don’t think about those delicious chocolate flavors.” But it’s too late. The battle is lost!

Obsessions Are Built In The Mind

Think of a huge floating pink elephant. Now that you have the image in your mind, stop thinking about it. Now, take a break from reading and for one minute; do not think of it. Think of anything else but that floating pink elephant.
Trying not to builds the desire, forcing you to think of nothing but pink elephants. Keep trying not to think of them and you will become obsessed with pink elephants.
We create powerful obsessions with food by trying not to eat certain foods. The more we try, the worse it gets. Eventually, the only thing filling our minds will be the thought of that pizza and pop, or whatever we are trying not to eat.
You have trained your mind to think obsessively. As kids, we ate when hungry and stopped when satisfied. By adulthood, we deteriorated into pleasure-centered food addicts.

Compulsive Disorders are Caused by Distorted Thinking

Compulsive eaters are the first to admit that we are living in a mental mess. Life is a series of worries and frustrations. Our emotions are controlled by outside events. We fail by eating one cookie and confidence plummets. Feeling hopeless, we completely give up and throw off all sense of restraint. Then comes the feeling of failure:

“I am a failure.”
“Everything I do fails.”
“Life is the pits.”
“I shouldn’t, but…”

Psychology calls it abstinence violation effect, the psychological reaction to violating a vow of abstinence. Simply said, the effect is a feeling of failure. And for some, failure is devastating.

After failure comes guilt. Guilt never works, but we use it anyway. We beat ourselves with guilt in a feeble attempt to whip a tired, weary soul back to the battlefield. But the soul groans in defeat, “I have had enough. I don’t care about this stupid diet.”

Why is it so hard? Why is it so difficult to eat a little less? After all, we desperately want to eat right. It is our heart’s desire. We want to be thin, healthy, full of life, looking great and living life to its fullest. But instead we throw it away for 20 seconds of taste-bud pleasure.